Alarm
I have always been interested in death, just as someone who travels early in the morning will always appreciate the alarm ringing. I believe that every once in a while we should experience a terrifying, loud alarm in order to keep each other awake from the dream of reality-artificiality. Understanding artificiality-reality as a complex creation of social agreements to establish an order—the alarm vibrates so hard . . .
In terms of staging something that isn’t supposed to be staged, I focus my interest on “staging intimacy.” I believe it is possible to stage intimacy in order to create atmospheres of pure honesty. If I cannot recreate near-to-dead experiences, I can at least attempt to access authentic, intimate spaces where the vibration of the alarm is palpable—almost like following steps to mimic a reality that overlaps different times. If the narrative is not linear we are able to overlap atmospheres that can disturb the normal.
2 November 2023
This time you are there first. I roll my working table through the door to enter the big gray ceiling room, in the middle of the space there is a donut-shaped table. I insert myself into the space, singing from the outside of the room:
“Alma mía, sola, siempre sola, sin que nadie comprenda tu sufrimiento, tu horrible padecer . . .”
I have your attention now. I sit in a rotating chair and take my computer to start telling you what I’ve been busy with for the past year. You are silent, attentive to the next move.
Tension.
Jose, my friend, is laying on the floor, eyes closed. I hope everyone is comfortable. I tell the story of a cute horse to warm up: Clever Hans. Clever Hans was the first creature that inspired me with this research on “Performance art and AI.”
Carl Stumpf was a scientist—science? Doctor? Mmm—I am confused, it’s not what I want to say. I look to the window for clarity on a static motion. “Was this moment of silence planned?” you wonder.
Psychologist! That is the word I was looking for!

What is referred to as the Clever Hans phenomenon (img Clever Hans phenomenon personal interpretation) can get more and more detached from what I believe is the truth but most important, THE OTHER.
But wait,
who am I then?
I present myself with all the valid IDs I have, to prove what I say, name, nationality, birth, medical devices in my body, and medicine I take in order to make me functional in society.

I take a moment to think while the SLIDES I show on a screen move back and forth to “ID MOMENT DATA” to “VIOLENCE,” back and forth, back and forth.
I prepared myself to go to the middle of the roundtable. Eva turns off the lights for me. Thank you Eva. I go calmly to close the curtains, I have the key to do so,
click and maintain.
The sound is magnificent, mechanical, calming, the curtains are huge, I go for the first, the second . . . click and maintain.
My friend Jose has been lying comfortably on the ground since I began my entrance, remember? Before the horse?

Now Jose is asleep. I softly wake him up; he wakes up and automatically plugs in a spotlight to point at what now I am preparing as a narrative ritual.
I explain a ritual I saw in Mexico—San Juan Chamula, Chiapas, 2022—where chickens were sacrificed, praying in a language I couldn’t understand and pine needles covered the floor, long candles were lighting the church where a mix of pagan and catholic blurred lines. (My attraction to these rituals is confusing, seems like a need of something solid where all around what is supposed to work is not working: politics, sanitary sistemps, education, laws, human rights.) This “real” feels for a reason more hopeful at the moment.
I narrate what I saw and I perform some of the actions. I act as if I kill a Chicken Bao, squish it until the plastic stops making sound, after popping. The smell of the candles and the pine tree needles mixed with some alcohol held in coca cola bottles gets back to me occasionally. My nose hasn’t been the same since Covid, sometimes I even think I lost my smell memories and I’m replacing them with this new damaged brain. Luckily humans, we work with smell archetypes—or unluckily.
I pass by the coca cola bottle that I have prepared to seal the enchantments I ask to the fire, the sounds and the smell. As an act of trust and maybe friendship you drink out of the bottle. Yikes, you were probably not expecting the strong liquor jijiji . . .

Lights go on again, I go back to my table. Thank you, Jose.
I feel like dancing, but not yet. I’m gonna do it later and have a fun time; you are looking, not dancing, just me.
Before dancing, I want to take a moment to remember the times I worked together with the students of the Dirty Art Department (I can tell you that on another occasion).
My mind is getting blurry now. I wish you were there to hear what I so desperately wanted to fit in a one hour presentation. I want to talk about body injuries; I want to talk about the human aspect of the AI apparatus, who’s working behind this monster; who is dedicated to classify. I want to dig in on how to classify what is ungraspable. I want to talk about materials, the matter necessary in order to make the AI hardware work. I want to tell you how interesting the effects are when those elements behave with fire, or are used in ceramics. I brought myself a piece we made together. I added neodymium to that piece and now it is beautiful, even more so than before.
Please do not think I don’t want to be generous with you now, it’s just . . . you know, I am working on strategies for transmitting my work when I am not there and it is still bugging me. Might be me romanticizing performance art or my not-yet capability to transmit my subjective eye. I am on it.